UPDATED November 4, 2021

BY Guest Author

IN

1 comment

UPDATED November 4, 2021

BY Guest Author

IN

1 comment

A New Research Paper From Professor Yanez

 

TDA staffer and Master Chef, Yanez Novoa, recently flew from South Africa to Costa Rica to join the Pura Vida Cycling Tour. His experiences inspired him to publish the following, peer-reviewed, research paper.

The challenges of flying with new restrictions pertaining to acute respiratory syndrome coronavirus 2 (SARS-CoV-2) commonly known as COVID 19

 

Introduction

Humans travelling by air has always been an experience of contradictions. The idea seems dangerous, but it has become considerably safer than travelling by land. It is unbelievably fast, allowing people to reach the other side of the world. Yet getting on the plane is painfully slow. You want to share your love with a place and fall in love with it, but to reach it you must cross all kinds of checks and obstacles which are based solely on fear. Once you get there it could be the middle of the day, but your body insists it is time to sleep and the whole experience leaves you swollen and confused. But then, no one said bending time and space would be easy.

Literature Review

Apart from the normal passport and visa requirements, every country and airline now has a form you need to fill in or an app you need to download. The airlines remind you of what you need to do at every step because, honestly, they want to make it really easy for you to give them your money and be happy doing it. For more information contact Prof. Yanez Novoa at the following link – http://www.ifyoufollowthislinkyoudontgettjejoke.com

Methodology

Like all great scientific papers, there is a formula that got scribbled on a napkin somewhere while drinking beer. This one looks as follows:

Rn being the new risk level of air travel.
Cov being the added threat of COVID.
S being the mitigating security measures.
Ru being the usual risk involved in flying.

Preliminary Data

When my test subject, TDA Tour Leader Emily Currie, flew the planes were pretty empty and she got 4 seats to herself and got bumped to Economy Premium (WooHoo!). A month later when I clambered aboard, the flights were pretty full with no complimentary bumping. Lufthansa now only seems to serve vegetarian food. Which is fine by me as the lack of choice means the trolly gets to me quicker.

Statement of Limitations

If you are flying business class, the preliminary data does not apply to you and I appreciate you not making eye contact while I waddle to my seat. If you have your own private jet, this whole study is irrelevant and good on you.

Albert Einstein waiting at Frankfurt airport to congratulate you on surviving the first leg of the experiment.

Conclusion

Vegetarianism is becoming more widespread with seemingly little resistance in Germany. If you studied the formula carefully you would be able to deduce that flying is no more dangerous than it was two years ago. Long haul flights are as amazing, yet as painful, as always. Regardless of how you feel about wearing a mask, it is a requirement at airports and on flights except when you are eating. So, bring extra cash for snacking. See you soon.

 

1 Comment for "A New Research Paper From Professor Yanez"

Brilliant!

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